I want to be alone

Ever heard the Greta Garbo expression, "I want to be alone". While that was always attributed to her, it may or may not have been her words. The further time gets away from events the cloudier it gets and gets and gets until it looks like we are looking through a fog or out dirty window. It is what Lillian Hellman would call Pentimento, like a picture behind a picture from when a painter changed his mind. How often do I change my mind? How often do I not change my mind? When should I and when shouldn't I? I ask my self these questions over and over and over until my mind is as muddy as the events that passed before me. The only thing to straighten everything out is to sit still and clear my mind, and rest in the arms of God. May He grant me peace and lead me where He wants me to go.

What a year, what a day! We all breath a collective sigh when Friday gets here or when the next morning gets here or when December 31 turns into January 1. Whew! All done with. Never more never more. But did we learn? And what have we learned? Have we grown from our bad year and have we shared our good year? What are we going to do? Most of the time all I do is store the information for a better day, sometimes I used the information I've been given and improved or taken a step back. But you know, most of the time I have to jog my memory that whatever happened, whatever I stored, God knows what I did and what I am doing with the information and He in His infinite wisdom blesses that knowledge to make it wisdom or else allows me to fall on my face again. Which the older I get the less often that happens. But being human it does happen. While I may not see it I do in some way process the information for His purpose. And He is always aware of how the information needs to be used. To meet His purpose.

A tangled web

"What a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive", said Sir Walter Scott in Marmion. My goodness this is never more true than in our politicians. Think of our politicians from those involved with the Teapot Dome Scandal, to those involved with Whitewater, from the reneged treaties with the Indians, to the officiousness of Homeland Security. We really love it when people can go before the press and be smooth talkers and down play those that will not talk until it suits them or until they feel it suits the moment. We are all for the pioneer, the rugged individual, yet we do not like someone to be their own person, to have raw emotions, in fact we don't get it. We don't get that raw emotions are the elemental foundation of all of our psyche and that most of us choose to hide those raw emotions. What gets me is that we often find ourselves in the same boat as someone that would show us raw emotions and yet we have no clue how to deal with neither the emotions nor the person. It makes us uncomfortable. And we hate jumping from foot to foot as our toes are being shot at. May we gain strength from one another and from God during our times of web-spinning so that we don't sacrifice our integrity in order to "make the deal".