What a world!!!

When the Christians first appeared on the scene, it was against the law to be a Christian, punishable by death. When Constantine came on the scene it was illegal not to be a Christian, also punishable by death. There have been slaves throughout history, the Jews in Egypt, the African and people of the Caribbean in America, and it took a long time un America to make it illegal to own slaves. But then it took until the 1960s to make discrimination against race illegal. Our issues now have to deal with LGBT folks. It's always something. We as a world we as a people look to polarize ourselves into one group or another. God looks at each of us as people, not black, not white, not Chinese, not gay. He looks at us and He judges us. HE judges us. That;s not my job. I know the scripture talks against being gay in the old testament. But wasn't that hung up on the cross with Christ? The old testament also talks against wearing tatoos. Interesting that we see those too.

Changes

So many times I think back on the whirlwind of these past few months and realize it is all for a reason. If my mom hadn't fallen I may not have taken the drastic steps to retire, and might have felt stuck in a job that was micromanaging me and controlling what I did even though I do everything by the regulations that are designated in the Code of Federal Regulations for meat inspection. If my mom hadn't fallen, I would not be faced now with putting her in a home or keeping her with me, even though over and over I have said she will be staying with me. Sitters are becoming scarce because the government chooses to waste money on people who could get out and work but are given everything so won't. The elderly suffer. I am amazed.

Most of all, mom's personality traits have really been coming out. The selfishness, the passive aggressiveness, the OCD and the lack of hope. She has had several good days though and it has had a positive effect on her. She went to the Arboreteum by University of Kentucky and loved it. She spent time with a dear sweet woman. It seems though that mom and I bring the worst out in the both of us. She insists on long dissertations to explain what she needs, I have this habit of calling her to her face a drama queen. Even though I took her with me to deliver information about my upcoming practice she insisted we go to eat and wouldn't brave the rain (which I cannot blame her) even though she wanted "a substantial meal", so settled on a sandwich place. She only ate part of it. Then later ate the rest which I thought was her dinner. Although she later got hungry and insisted she needed a substantial meal, BUT....she insisted on saying in dramatic fashion "I am weak".

At any rate, and regardless of whatever our relationship is, the next few months I will be able to spend more time as the new venture is an in-home venture. And there is always the Senior Center. Hopefully we can grow closer together because after all we are God's gift to one another.

Here goes!!!!

This weekend kicks off my business. I have one client Saturday and one Sunday. God is a blessing indeed. I am scared, nervous, unsure but I know that I am led by my God and He knows the outcome of things... all I have to do is go in and do things,,, knowing and praising him all the day long. I love God. He has provided for me and He will provide for all those who call on Him in His will and purpose.

STRESSS!!!!!

Well life is full of stressors.... work....people one works with... a mom that is 92 in years and 12 in emotions at the moment. She is sitting in an easy chair pouting about me not bringing her her computer because I am busy which she thinks I am playing. And then she drums her fingers and says, "Well?".... I am beginning a new business.... and while I am excited I am just not sure it's the right thing to do even if God did tell me to retire and do this. Stressors can make me feel choked more than anything but God knows what I have been through and I love Him for that. For all the struggles, for all the micromanagement of jobs, all the impatience of our elderly people, all the unknown I love Him. Desparately....