Family

It was the second month since mom passed. On the 19th of Novemeber, there was a bit of a cloud over me. No apparent reason. Just a cloud. And then I remembered the date. And I got gloomier because there is a finality in this. Mom's not coming back. She's not visiting with Brian or going on a trip with her AARP group. She;s not coming back. At the Thanksgiving celebration something was missing. She's not coming back. I look at an empty bed. She's not coming back. I think that is what is staying in my mind as if to prove to my soul that she's actually gone because quite frankly I can't believe it. And what hurts is that many of my family have been in that situation of not coming back. Over the past 27 years I've lost people that I loved and were family. And bits and pieces are missing because those guys won't come back. And what lives on is memory. Bittersweet memory. I am grateful for the family that was given to me, to make such pleasant memories. And I am also sad that those who are gone are not coming back.